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A very common symptom observed in children with ASD is difficulty with pragmatic language, more specifically the inability to grasp what types of language are appropriate in which types of scenarios or situations. Difficulties to look out for can include asking inappropriate questions, initiating off-topic conversations, misinterpreting jokes or sarcasm, or taking non-literal language as literal, etc. Five ways to help your child use language more appropriately are listed below.

1. Discuss appropriate language for different types of settings.

   It is important to talk to your child about several different made-up and real-life situations to determine what’s okay and what is not okay to say in those specific situations. Ask your child specific questions related to the situations. The more specific you are, the better. For example, “Who is it okay to say these things to?, When is it all right to discuss these subjects?” Make up set rules along the way in order for your child to understand and apply them to real life.

2. Role play scenarios for practice.

   Once your child understands the few basic rules, you can start practicing when you are out in certain settings, make up fake dialogues, or roleplay at home. Once progress is being made, you can begin asking your child to provide you with more than one possible appropriate response for each scenario. This will help to develop the understanding that there is always more than one acceptable way to interact during a conversation, as long as it remains within the limits of social norms.

3. Encourage your child to rephrase what they just said.

   If your child says a word wrong or uses improper grammar when they are formulating their response, you can respond to and rephrase their intended message as opposed to making your child feel like they have failed by solely focusing on the errors of the message. For example, if your child says “I goed to the park with nana,” you can say, “yes, you went to the park with Nana, Did you have a good time?”

4. Talk about the importance of non-verbal communication.

   Gestures and facial expressions are a huge part of any language’s meaning, however it is not uncommon for people with autism to misunderstand these visual cues. Different ways to work on this with your child may include; talking about individual features as well as how different gestures and expressions pair together to mean certain things. For example, narrowed eyes or a scrunched nose tend to mean suspicion or disgust.

5. Teach the art of persuasion.

   Those with pragmatic language impairment commonly struggle with the ability to see other people’s point of view or perspective. One way to help your child overcome this, is by asking them to practice putting themselves in other people’s shoes and discuss how you would convince someone to see your point. You can also ask your child to elicit a desired response from you. For example, if your child wants a new puppy, he’s more likely to get one if he speaks about his ability to be responsible, as opposed to telling you he wants to ride it around the house like a pony. This will help your child learn to focus on what his/her intended audience cares about, further understanding other people’s motivations and emotions. Once this understanding is established your child will be able to pick an appropriate response that matches these emotions and motivations.

-Deidre B

https://blog.theautismsite.greatergood.com/pragmatic-language/